My honest review of the Xiaomi Mi Band 4 as a Swim tracker

DISCLAIMER: This is not a sponsored review, thoughts and views are purely independent.

I bought the Xiaomi Mi Band 4 from a boy in Puchong for RM150 around two weeks ago.

If you are too lazy to read until the end of the blog post: For a personal fitness tracker, it is shit. For a nice cheap smart watch with decent features, it is great.

Okay, here is the long review.

I have never bought a smart watch before or even worn one. But with recent trend of smart watches having more and more fitness tracking features, most importantly swim tracker, I was sort of hooked. 

So the choices in my mind were either an Apple Watch 4 or a Garmin Fenix 5S. I bought neither because I got a proper watch instead. Lol.

But with the most recent Chinese Brands like Honor, Huawei and Xiaomi of producing cheap smart watches, smart band, fitness tracker or whatever you would call it, there was the latest one, the Xiaomi Mi Band 4. 

And yes, it has a swim tracker. So I decided to get one with hopes of tracking my swimming habits so that I could post it on social media like a douche to show how many Kilometres of swimming I have racked up.

But I didn't post anything, cause.... I don't want to be a douche (lol just kidding)

Okay, lets talk about the watch.

I got the watch when it first came to Malaysian shores about two weeks ago. I bought it from a guy in Puchong. He sold it to me for RM150. It was sealed brand new in a box from China. (It was the chinese version). At this point you may wonder why I didnt just buy it from Lazada for only RM110 like that. Because, I was so excited it had a swim tracker, I dont want to wait a few days for Lazada, I wanted to use it instantly and test out the swim tracker. That was what exactly what I did.

After COD with the guy from puchong, I head straight home and charged the damn thing. It took around less than 2 hours from 0%. As soon it was charged, I head down to the pool to try out the swim tracker function :D

But before we head to the swim function, lets talk about what fitness tracker function it has (for other functions, go watch a youtube video or something, I am too lazy to write it down)

i-Outdoor running

ii-Treadmill

iii-Cycling

iv-Walking

v-Exercise

vi-Pool Swimming

From what I know for distance tracking for walking activities and cycling (besides treadmill), it links to your phone gps and you need to bring your phone along while you run in order to get accurate distance logging.

For other sports, they claim it has some sort of gyro sensor thingy that could track your movement and stuff and translate that into how many steps you have taken.

You must be curious, is it accurate?

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

To be honest, you can shake the mi band and it records you have done 10-20 steps even though all you've done is shaking your hand back and forth.

For the exercise function..... I have no idea. It suppose to detect you do reps or something like that. (Go search for a review on that lol)

And now, lets get back to swimming.

So I was super excited to try it out at the pool. So the swimming function , you need to select the distance of the pool. It had 50m, 25m and custom. In custom you can set according to the actual length of the pool.

My pool is around 25-30m, so I chose 25m.

So I tried swimming 100m first and did breast stroke which is around 4 laps. I looked at the watch and it recorded 100m! wow! how could a cheap RM150 watch do that! So I swam some more, until 600meteres. I stopped the tracking. It recorded 625 meters. It was off by 25m, it was acceptable for its price. It sort of grew on me. It also detected what kind of stroke I was doing (Mindblown, but to be honest it could only detect breast stroke and freestyle accurately (sometimes)) 

Over the period of two weeks, I swam with it again and again. Then I realised something, the distance was getting more and more off. I did two laps of slow breast stroke, it showed 3 laps. I did 50 meters, it showed 100meters. I did breast stroke, it recorded I was doing freestyle. Even at a smaller pool at my parents place, it was way way off.

So I got back to my place and swam today. I gave up. It was way off too much. 2 laps become 3, reset again and still the same. Breast stroke became free style, 50m become 100m.

For today, I decided to swim 50 laps before i stopped the watch. It was a mixture of breast stroke and free style. I normally warm up with breast stroke, continue with free style in the middle and cool down with breast stroke.

The watch recorded that I did 68 laps, freestyle (normally if I mix my strokes it would record as medley). I wanted to print screen the swim log but it didnt record it and it didnt show up on my phone -_- (PHUCK)

I dont want to be that douche to post numbers of me swimming even though it is inaccurate. To be a douche, you need to be a douche with integrity. (lol jk jk)

Anyway, I'm selling off this watch to soothe my broken heart (lol)

Yes, the cat is giving sign languages if you were wondering

Verdict:

Pros:

-It is cheap

-Makes a good watch

-Has a good alarm function

-You can use it to ring your phone if you lose your phone in the house

-Battery is superbly good

-Heart rate monitor sort of works

Cons

-Swim tracker is shit

-Walking tracker is shit

10 Year Appreciation Post

I cant believe this blog is already more than 10 years old.

I've been going through some of the old posts,

I am a bit sad that I couldnt have contributed more for the past few years.

It feels like going through 10 years of memories in a flash. Slow flashback? Throwback? Whatever back?

I think I might close this blog down and jump and open a website with my own domain instead, I am considering WIX

Surprisingly, my previous post, had some numbers. Honestly, who are these ghost readers? I would really like to know, maybe we could be friends lol.


So the title of the post is 10 year appreciation post.

Honestly, I dont think I appreciated this blog so much. Is this a reflection of I am not appreciating myself enough?

So lets look back of what had happened for the last 10 years

1-The government changed (fairly recent though)

2-Worked in two companies with multiple roles

3-Bought a house

4-Got into a serious relationship

5-Got a degree

6-Read books (like yes, I read books now haha)

7-Sort of became vegan when possible (this was quite recent)

8-Subscribed to netflix

9-Lived in the middle of the Sea for prolonged periods of time

okay, at this part, I sort of liked stopped an starred and looked back into my life....

I'm having an overthinking or an anxiety attack on whether what I should write.

There are things deep inside me that I should just let out though I just cant.

I dont know, maybe another time. 

Its August?

Yes it is august.

I am slowly trying to build up my long gone writing skills.

I have no idea on how I was so passionate in writing back then.

I am taking word by word of Tun M's advice to read and write.

I guess this is the phase of life where phone zombies just cant stop going out of the rabbit hole.

Losing all sense of creativity, time, value and many others.

Dont you just hate the cycle where you get back home from work,

lie down on your bed and just get stuck in the rabbit hole of browsing your phone over and over again

Keep switching apps over and over again just to get that hand position of holding the phone.

I guess its a bad habit I need to break free from.

Though 7 months has passed throughout the year, I would say it was quite a meaningful one.

I just dont know what else to say.......

Lets save it for later..... (hopefully not never)

A year and counting

It has been almost a solid year since I deleted social media apps from my phone. The last post I posted on instagram was on the 1st of August 2017 and it was not even a photo, it was a cut-out from an article that shows swimmers seems to have younger organs than their real age lol.

I guess many of you are wondering (if my blogger readers still exist) why I quit social media. There's a long blog post of why here --->LINK TO BLOG OF WHY I DELETED MY SOCIAL MEDIA APPS .

Many of you ghost readers out there up to this point may be wondering (after reading the blog post perhaps) what has progressed over the year of quitting social media. To be honest, I think the most time consuming social media would be instagram. I kinda find instagram to be a short form acronym of "Instant Gratification". After deleting Instagram, I sort of lost the will of trying to pose like an idiot to get the perfect photo to show the world how awesome my life is. I simply mastered a part of not giving a f*ck. Like seriously. Just walk around an art expo or an event or somesort, people just dont absorb the atmosphere anymore, their heads are looking down on their phone or forcing their friends to take the best photo pose of them so that they could upload to social media and prove the self worthy and gain fake social validation from the internet community. Furthermore, I dont have much more free time rather than trying to upload and insta-story or somesort. Further down the line, I also dont know whats going on with the people I follow on instagram, There was an instance that I had no idea my friend just had a kid. I found out he had a kid when he came by and we had real social interaction at a restaurant that he brought his wife and kid to eat dinner together and I was like WHOAAAA SINCE WHEN YOU HAD A KID? lol I would say, that it is sort of a drawbacks of you not knowing of your friends that you care who they seem to exclusively upload their life progress only through instagram (lol, such an exclusive breed). I seriously have a lot more to rant about instagram, but I guess you all would get the point by now (gosh i just love typing with my new mechanical keyboard hahaha)

Anyway, you may also be wandering, what about your other social media apps, twitter and facebook? Yes, I deleted them too. Though I only open them with my phone browser. My facebook basically only has feeds of news from pages that I follow and to check for wedding invitations. I basically un-followed everyone on facebook to appear on my feed, though I still remain friends with them. I occasionally share interesting news and mostly photos of cute cats. Talking about weddings, there some instances I had no idea that some of my facebook friends got married due to not following them in my feed and they did not invite me to their wedding (lol).

So, what about my twitter account? I muted all annoying feeds (sorry) and mostly interesting news on my feed. 

I do get stuck sometimes in the never ending black hole of twitter and facebook even though looking at them via web browser, but that only happens when I am being an arse towards myself and not thinking of the greater good I could do with all that time. As soon as I snap out of it, I mostly do something productive. But the bright side of not using the app, it gives some sort of resistance to like stop using it and you dont get the full addictive experience if you use it on browser. Furthermore, you dont get instant notifications. Notifications is the devil, its the trigger to go deep into the bottomless abyss. Its hard to resist that red dot with the number inside.

Now, at this stage, you may be wondering, what has happened so far with all the free time?

Lets make a list

1-I get free time (obviously)

2-I stop thinking of taking photos of every activity which are deemed cool to post on social media

3-I discovered the sweetness of not giving a f*ck

4-Almost a million ringgit in debt for 35 years haha 

5-Got on to many phases in life

6-Discovered big challenges to overcome my worsening anxiety, faced it and said f*ck you anxiety

7-Managed to finished off a lot of books.

8-Discovered weekends alone at home can be quite funnnn haha

9-Swam a 7 km swimathon (again) and did worst timing than previously did two years ago by two minutes lol

10-Got on to much more serious phases in life (ehem ehem)

11-Forgave people for how much of an ass they are and pretty much say f*ck you to them

12-Cursed much more than before

13-Care about people who really matter

14-The government changed 

15-Discovered DIY home improvement stuffs and failed miserably at it and learned the hard way to resolve it lol

I think the list could go on and on and on....

Anyway, the only reason I feel like writing lots and lots again, Dr.M said, one way to keep your brain sharp is to read and write. I hope I get to live until 90 plus like him. 

Thats all for now..... Shall write some more in the near future since I just love tapping my mechanical keyboard lol

Mechanical Keyboard

Roughly about more than a week ago, I decided to get myself a mechanical keyboard. So I was walking around, window shopping at ALL IT KLCC, I manage to find an Elysium Lofree Dot Keyboard for RM249. Yes, RM249. Suprisingly, the keyboard last year costs around RM400. So I decided to get one at the discounted price. The great thing about this keyboard is that its probably the only mechanical bluetooth wireless keyboard around.  Most mechanical keyboards are wired, this is because mechanical keyboards are normally used by hard core gamers in order to get the best speed response. Bluetooth has some drawbacks, its a bit laggy compared to wired keyboards. Though I've been using this keyboard for a little over a week, I dont feel the lag at all and I also dont game on my laptop PC lol.

Anyway, this blogpost is basically me testing out the keyboard. The clickety clack sound of the keys does give you a sense of satisfaction after pressing each keys. I'm planning to blog post even more to feed my satisfaction of each key press. Pushing buttons eh? lol I'm planning to snooze early tonight and get things done in the morning I guess. I really should reduce playing with my phone too much.

Social Media, Cambridge Analytica and ELON MUSK

I really to get myself a personal workstation. A place where I could plan out ideas, a place where I can store my important documents, a place where I could study and gain the knowledge of the Universe! lol

I guess I left the previous blog post in a bit of a hangover, I looked at my stats just now, I only had ten views, 2 of them probably myself proofreading my post and making sure the layout looks nice lol. Besides that, a few years ago, the reading list was like a twitter feed, endless rolls of new blogposts from aspiring writers. I've checked the reading list, there's literally like only two people writing blogs whoa. One is a avid writer who shares all kinds of wonderful stuff about travelling, inspirational activities and interesting english lessons. The other, was a blog of an ex-classmate which I have no idea of where the person is or what the person is doing with its life, but its a blog of expressive words song lyrics or poem like. Oh well.

I think I have grown older or sort of hit some level of maturity, I'm enjoying reading/watching/listening to news such as Al-Jazeera, BBC World & BFM. I have no idea why. I love BFM the most. Even save interesting podcasts from BFM on my phone with the BFM phone app.

The past week, there was a big issue that affected the world's political turmoil. It was regarding a data firm (sort of), Cambridge Analytica. What was claimed was, 50 Million facebook user's data was retrieved and being manipulated of changing what was coming in your news feed and change of you perceive things, which include political votes. (GOSH SOMETHING RANG A BELL WHILE WRITING THIS, THERE WAS A FACEBOOK INFO THINGY ON POLITICAL VIEWS! LOL). Anyway, the 50 million facebook users data however was sort of a key or a path to friends of the users (i'm not sure whether it was 50 million that came from 6 million maybe or whatever number.) But 50 million! wow! all the likes, all the comments all the bawang posts like wow! just imagine if you have all of that! wow! okay, too much wow! lol.

Anyway, with all the facebook data leaked and stuff, I, myself, havent been very active on facebook. The only reason I use facebook for the time being, is to check notifications on wedding invitations, interesting activities and newsfeed from pages that I like (IGN, NAS DAILY, GAMESPOT and etc.).

Most recent news is that, ELON MUSK himself, deleted his facebook pages! like, WOW!

All these facebook turmoil stuff got me thinking, how was life before the facebook age?! like seriously, how was it?! I'm having trouble of focusing my imaginations, but let me try to write it down here, maybe that would help.

Technically, I've been on facebook back in early 2008. I have no idea why I had an account in the first place, might be probably because my elder sister had one and she's the sort of hipster of trends and stuff, I might have accidentally followed suit lol. But I wasnt very active. I only got addicted when I was in my foundation years, back in 2009. Facebook was the in thing. Fast forward a few years later, I got myself a blackberry and I guess that is the prequel of how I got hooked on facebook lol.

So how was life pre-facebook days. Was it good? was it bad? Before Facebook, I was an active user of myspace and friendster. Though myspace and friendster well.... there was a lot less views and dicussions a lot less bullshit maybe. But most importantly, I didnt cared about other people's lives and how the way they think. There was no sort of like , oi, look at what i think oi, look at my baby, oi, look at how awesome my life is. There was non of that.

One thing that I realized after addiction towards social media of any form, I just forgot how to really focus anymore. How I found how this occurred, when I watched a movie on tv, i just seem to be focused on my phone for some intervals. It happens like subconsciously, like almost anywhere and for any activity. If you dont believe me, go out with some friends and do activities like going to the gym and stuff, and just observe how the phone pops up and they become zombies. 

Be Yourself

"Be yourself", such a subjective term, yet we hear people say it all the time to people who lack confidence in whatever hassles they faced in their daily lives.

"Be yourself", kinda gets annoying hearing it a few times. What does it mean by "being yourself"? So how do you be yourself?

Lets put this into a much different context, lets view this in a different way. I'm sure many of us yuppies who are aged 25 years old and above have watched "The Truman Show" or even played "The Sims" before. But in this case, lets put ourselves in "The Truman Show". You are the director and you are watching your life. Lets view ourselves in a third person view, but instead of dictating what you should do like in the sims, just put it on auto-play and see where it goes.

So now, you are on a giant TV screen and you can see whatever you are doing, but you have no control over yourself. You are the audience of your own life. So what is the name of your own show about your life? lets call it "Being yourself"

Lets just imagine you have went through many seasons of your life and you have the blu-ray disc set which you wonder when you will ever rewatch (I would definitely watch RICK & MORTY AGAIN! LOL). So lets assume, you remembered all the seasons of your life, by heart, like every single episode, every single action, every philosophy and etc (I hope you understand what I'm trying to get here).

So, you watched everything and congratulations, you discovered how you are "being yourself!" (congratulations, worked so hard forgot to vacation....lol) As a number 1 fan of your own show, you are required to give an IMDB review of it. Furthermore, you have to be super honest about your own show.

Like many things on IMDB, there are the reviews by "professional" critics and reviews by honest fans. Okay, forget about IMDB, you need to write a review on rotten tomatoes instead since you are going to be super honest about it.

For example, Star Wars The Last Jedi is the stupidest star wars movie ever made! (Thats an honest review by me lol)

Now lets get to the review writing part. Before you start writing the super honest review of your own show, you think back of all the seasons you watched and understood by heart, your self-awareness skyrocketed and you realized, you suck at being yourself, you hate being yourself.

"Being yourself" could be a man who lives in fear, have bad habits, had every chance of improving your life but not taken a chance and etc.

I guess "being yourself" is not the best option at all. So how do we go on from here? What if the first 10 seasons sucked and for the 11th season, you are not on autopilot anymore, you are the director, the mouse clicking every actions behind a sims game.

I am not here to say my life sucked too bad or anything, I am grateful for whatever positive things that happened which are beyond my control or... in other words, good or bad, you'd never know....

So how about things that we can control? Think about it.

Roughly half a year ago. I decided to change how I make my decisions. I started to step outside and took the leap of faith. The leap of faith of not to worry of the implications of my actions.I stood by, as long as I don't break any laws and treat others with respect, I'm sure it wont go too bad if things go wrongly lol.

Among the biggest change of my life that I made, (i think i mentioned this before on one of my previous blog post) I stopped instagram, like literally. My last ig post was on the 1st of August 2017.  I stopped looking at other people's lives and subconsciously compare it to myself and end up being miserable, loss of sense gratification towards life itself (okay, that may be a bit too far haha). Surprisingly, other forms of social media actually followed.

I was starting to live. I stopped thinking of trying to get the best shot for my instagram posts and at the same time subconsciously (or consciously lol) trying to show the world how awesome my life is towards other people lol

Over the months that followed, I made decisions towards a new phase of adulthood. It was like a journey of self discovery. I was slowly creeping out the life of fear. I was aware that at some points over the months, there were things I really felt that I wanted to speak out, but I chose to stay patient, though it was not because of fear, it was because I realized the bigger picture ahead.

Besides that, on my self discovery journey, I also discovered that some people, no matter how long you've known them, at one point, you just realized how much of an ass they are throughout your life. You just feel like punching them in the face or speak out your opinions. Though, I chose to just keep the harmony and distance myself. It may be an easier path to stay patient, whether the outcome over time would be good or bad, I cant really say to be honest.

On a positive note, over the past few months, I discovered really awesome people as well and also very specific positive notes (persistence and perseverance pays I guess haha)

Right now I am trying to find how do I conclude this blog post hmmmmm haha

What I am trying to say is, what if "being yourself" just doesnt cut it. What if, you could lay out a plan of positive actions that you can control, you give yourself a trial on the plan you laid out and if it doesnt work out, pick yourself up, adjust the plan and adapt, maybe?

how do I conclude this? hmmm maybe for another blog post.... maybe.....
  

The next step and personal finance

I am indeed sleepy af. Though I am uncertain why my creative vibes keeps giving me ideas at the wee hours of the night. I guess it must be the weather and the calmness of the night. Oh yeah, its a public holiday for a few days up until monday, such a rare occurrence.

I was offered a deal I couldnt resist. Though I require large form of start-up investment in order to gain from the deal. I was naive in my calculations before, now I have to recalculate and it seems a bit hard in the beginning but would eventually help out in the long run.

Asked a friend who faced similar challenges, she says its normal to have that feeling and its always worth investing as it is an asset not a liability which degrades over time.

I've been going through a few websites on guides and stuff, even drafted my own spreadsheet. Now I am even more confused than ever. I felt the light, but then the dark side took over due to confusion.

The true meaning of love is to let go. Is it worth letting go all the blood sweat and tears? Maybe.. just maybe....

I would lose the fund to build a future for a partner though I gained very wised words of wisdom from a friend. "The investment is of course going to cost you, though getting married technically not, it is just a handshake".

*Mind blown*

Will be going through a lot over the next few weeks. Once I start to understand, I shall post a financial guide for dummies.

What are we afraid of?

What are we afraid of?

Gosh, I cant believe I still have readers here. Recently I had a request to share my meal prep spaghetti recipe which I normally do during my broke days (LOL). I shall do that soon............ uncertain how soon haha

So how's life been for the past hmmm year i guess? I was literally gone for half of the year this year due to adulthood. It wasnt easy, but it was definitely rewarding. A kind of a journey of a new sense of purpose of life.

As for later days ahead, the future that is, i am thoroughly planning for the next steps of adulthood. It has been quite a while since my last post, it might have been quite an emotional post for a 26 year old man like me, but oh well, it could either be a mistake to write it or it could either inspire, only god knows, what do we have to be afraid of right?

Life has been good so far, I've managed to read quite a significant number of books and slowly overcoming my phone addiction. Most recently I deleted the instagram and facebook app from my phone. I didnt delete my account, I still open my facebook account once a while, but that is just to follow up whether I have any interesting invites (weddings, open houses & etc.)  I still actively tweet, though I am not as addicted to it compared to fb and ig.

So far I am surprised how much hours of my life I have underutilized due to mindless soulless waste of unproductive scrolling on fb & ig. My weeknights ended before 10pm surprisingly. I was shocked that I was done with my daily necessities and house chores (and they were actually done lol). I was ready for bed before 10pm, *mindblown* *lol*

Besides that, I gained hours in the morning too, my previous routine was, as i woke up, i do meaningless scrolls which caused me to lose minutes of my life. and fortunately, I was up and ready to work and I literally had 30 minutes before the actual time I leave for work. So I manage to clean up or sweep the house a bit, then I leave for work. Somehow, I woke up much more fresher. I guess the screen detox is working out.

As for life skills, I learned to cook my own pizza and pretzels hooray lol and oh, I successfully cooked lasagna without causing anyone to get sick lol (HOMEMADE PASTA SHEETS!).

back to the topic, what are we afraid of?

After many depressing failures and going to hell and coming back alive, I've come to realize that, if something wasnt meant for, its just not meant for you. But there's no harm of asking the higher power and working hard for it, but if it is not meant for you, then its good to move on. There's no harm to grieve either, just grieve to let your mind clear and think of the greater rewards ahead. If there is loss, have faith that there is something better for you and you shall work hard for it. This paragraph is basically a collective of a summary of all the learning the hard ways in life so far that taught me.

Recently, I was contacted by a person that I highly respected, asking for a favor. However, the favor that was asked was utterly disappointing and heartbreaking. It is more heartbreaking not because of the favor, it was because of the favor that was asked from a highly respected person. I was asked to reduce interaction in order to avoid the person's significant other from having the wrong perception. Or in a much more understandable terms, to avoid the significant other from being jealous.

As a mature and understanding person would do, I agreed to the terms in order to maintain peace and harmony, to retain balance of the force lol. Honestly, I am surprised a person is intimidated by me. I have been single and not in a serious relationship for almost 4 whole years. I am not even among the most handsome of men. Not the alpha male sort.

As I said before, I agreed to the terms, though today, there was an unexpected twist, I discovered that, the respected person removed me entirely from the platform of communication. I was devastated and  heartbroken. How could a person like me would disrupt a relationship? Honestly, I just dont know how the world works or thinks around me anymore. So I took a few moments of grief and decided to act on a way that would benefit both sides (and still maintain harmony lol).

So back to the question, what are we afraid of? or what am i afraid of the implications of my actions? What I did, wouldnt be a problem more than ten years ago. So I took a leap of faith and let the owner of the universe decide my path with the "respected person". If we were to communicate again on good terms, that is because god is willing. As of now, I shall respect your terms and future proof it for your own good sake.

And to whoever I meet or networked with along my path throughout my life in the near and distant future, that is because god is willing for our paths to cross. May we use the network to benefit us in our favor and all humankind.

I do not have much to say to that respected person, but I highly hope you reconsider your perception on the people around you. Dont be afraid, put on some faith in people.If it meant to be, then it is meant to be....

Good luck in life everyone, may the odds be in your favor.

The Feeling?

I'm feeling a bit restless tonight. At the same time, I feel like I should take a year hiatus and wander out seeking what the world has to offer out of my comfort zone.

Towards the end 2015, Justin Bieber released a new album. Besides the hit song "Love yourself" there were many other really good songs in the album. I listened to all of them, though one song I liked most among all, "The Feeling"

The verse that got me related the most was, " Am I in love with you or am I in love with the feeling"

It makes wonder of what love truly meant. I still couldn't define it in my own terms and kept on wondering what the verse really meant. Is it the emotion? Is it the connection? Is it the presence? Is it the security? Maybe its just one of those songs that keeps you in paradox and would never come to a sole understanding. The sort of song which has a unique meaning to the listener. Or I should ask justin bieber himself of what the song really meant. I'm sure if i google it i would find the answer, but I'll rather not to and let the feeling of curiosity wonder in my mind each time i listen to it.

Curiosity is contagious.

What a weekend it has been. I manage to achieve a goal in my short quarterlife crisis bucket list. Quarter life crisis bucket list, lol. Nowadays, it seems people tend to be less and less creative in their choices of choosing what they enjoy. Millennials like me are brainwashed with television of what feels good, what is bad, what is good to do, how to enjoy life and so on. It seems that everyone is pretty much doing the same thing to cross things in their bucket list. I'm sure that if you have a long bucket list or so, a typical person would have at least half of the items the same as everyone else. I do not wish to elaborate further. I'm pretty sure you would have encountered information like this before.

Starting tomorrow, my soul is pretty much attached to my career for a short while. I am feeling a bit restless tonight, though surprisingly, it is not career is what i am thinking about. It is what I have encountered over the past 24 hours.

I would describe myself a talkative outgoing person. During one meeting, my boss asked everyone, so who is going to entertain the client? and fingers were point at me. Though inside, I am quite of an introvert. I really cherish going out alone or in very small numbers, even though one might think I might be a loser loner. Some say being alone is a sign of strength. But I say I like staying away and avoid other people's bullshit. Though to those that I care, I really, really do care. The way I show that i care its either obvious, mostly unknown or out of the blue surprises. Though this is also not what I am restless about. It was about what I encountered, the story i wrote in my head as the way i experienced it.

How about I explain this in a poetry or artsy fartsy kind of way? lets try.....

Hello there again

I saw you

I'm sure you saw me too

You were looking as beautiful as I last saw you

You were in blue, I was too

You were sitting by your friend who was anxious for the rest of her life

I dont know whether you were too occupied or too busy

or maybe you were thinking your next phase in life

or the wrong image of me have been implied in your head

I'm not sure whether it was me or I really felt that sense of negativity

I waited outside by the table, having dinner with the people I came with

I'm not sure maybe you were shy to join us or still preoccupied with whatever was going on inside

The gig was up, you were still there

We never said hi, we never had eye contact

I was 75% sure my gut was right from the beginning

I just felt awkward being there with your presence

I really do feel, you would enjoy more if i avoided you

It was getting late at night,

still no hello, no conversation of hows life and whats going on,

Was it the image set in your mind or was it all my imagination

The next day I came,

You were still there,

Still no hello, no conversation,

I implanted an image, for you to be happy, I shall stay away..

An so I did.

Though when we were crazy for the camera, you wanted to join too

I shall be positive and I shall stay away.

I'm not in love with you

But I'm still human too

Good bye, so long and thanks for the fish.

When the air is clear, I hope I was the fool

And not you..


And then there was the other you
the busy one
I bumped into something interesting
I'm sure your close relative would like
You did not respond to it
You asked me how I was
I avoided responding
I had a test that day
I needed a clear mind
but thats all bullshit
I really meant not responding
coz i know i'll be left hanging
Like how i was before...

-End-

Yes, I know you all are wondering what the hell are all these lines about, lets just keep it a mystery like Justin Bieber's song written earlier....

Previous Blog Post Part 2

So this post is a continuation of the previous post. I continued keeping my options clear. This morning during breakfast there was an interesting video posted on facebook. It was called 2 minute meditation for bitches who dont know how to meditate (yes, that is what exactly the video is about) After watching the video, I totally fell in love with the presenter. It is sad that the video aint on youtube otherwise, I would have posted it here.

There was another video I listened to during the drive on the way to JB. It was What I learned from 100 days of rejection by Jia Jiang. It was a ted talk, a very interesting one. After listening to the fruitful video, I realized my biggest fear. Rejection. This doesnt just affect my love life, it applies to almost everything. Among my greatest fear, is rejection from secretaries of whatever paperwork regardless of work or govt offices.

After watching the meditation video, I realized something. I realized what I am attracting to this one woman I've been dying to date with. She wasnt your typical girl, she was a bad ass girl who isnt afraid to voice out her opinions and take charge when she wants. The sort of really smart bad ass girl. That was why I could relate to the first video so much.

Lets get back to the second video. So it was about the guy's experience in facing rejection. I realize I may have just quit too soon. (quit what you may ask?) okay, lets talk about the girl first. I never have actually went out with her. She's a girl who is very dedicated to her job and her family. I really adore that about her. I like bad ass dedicated girls lol. Okay, well another thing that I like about her, is her love of cars. Which I give a hundred points for that trait.

We contact each other through social networks. Among the main events of my chronology with her, she posted something interesting from a market in her IG. I liked that interesting thing, so I text her and said can she buy that for me and so she did.

Many many many months later, I had received an interesting package at my office. I received the stuff from the market, she gave it to me as a gift. It also had a written post card with it and with the official stamp of her first job. (You see how passionate she is?! +++)

I texted her that I received the stuff and I really wanted to treat her for lunch. So, we continued texting each other once a while. My attraction towards her grew stronger and stronger over time. A few months later, I had a day off, she also had the day off, so I asked her out, she said YES!

I drove to her place which was an hour away and picked her up. She took me to a famous local beriyani shop nearby. She was so into her job, I remembered she was talking on the phone with her colleague during lunch for about 10 minutes, while I slowly ate my lunch. Was slightly annoyed initially because I really wanted to talk to her, but after a while, I understand she is bad ass at her job and that is really sexy, so I grew fonder towards her. (bad ass means good here, not bad lol)

After lunch, we went to the nearest city an hour away. Had a good walk and talk with each other, and multiple selfies.  It was interesting to know her more. Among the things that got me hooked, she likes having alone time , what I understand was, she hates people as much as I do and hates crowded places. Which was a trait that I live by. I was already imagining the quiet places we could go together in the future and enjoy each others company.

We also shared our family's traits and interests. I truly believe I could get along with her quite well. There were many points where the puzzle pieces falls perfectly into place.

After sending her back, we regularly text each other for the remaining weeks. I was planning to speak my heart out, I didnt want to rush, but the solid plan was there. It was just a matter of time. I had to go overseas for two months, before I flew, she gave me a call. We had a good talk, she had a hectic day but her voice was calm as she was heading to sleep.

As I was overseas, we texted regularly, Though towards the end of two months, her text response were slow and sometimes not at all. As I got back, I was on leave for two weeks. I texted her that I really wanted to meet her as I was nearby, but her response was she was too busy to even go out for a short dinner and she felt it was unfair to me to drive an hour away just to meet her for a short meet up.

My heart was crushed. I was actually planning to clear things out to her, to let her know what I feel about her and hopefully if everything works out, we could plan out the next step. But I guess that was just it. I couldnt bear to take any further steps.

Referring to the previous post regarding on my overthinking, I still couldnt stop thinking about her. Thinking on, what did I have done wrong, what was the wrong step, where did I messed up, I still couldnt figure it out and it gave me a bad headache.

Now back to the earlier paragraphs. Rejection. and so i thought, maybe I quit a bit too soon. Since I am going to pass by her place later today, I decided to text her and asked her out. She was on her off day, though she had to turn me down, she had plans already for the day. I really dont know what sign is this, should I call it quits?

Relationships, past, present and beyond

Interesting discussion in a whatsapp group today. Someone got engaged and a friend asked, she got engaged, when are you?

I answered, well, I tried and I failed.

So the question is now, "tried"?

Yes, effin tried.

I am a bit of an overthinking person, I can think of the finest details before acting or doing anything. Up to every single damn thing. Even trying to write a damn post takes many reviews before I post it. I miss myself where I just write or do whatever the heart desires. I guess whenever I think or act things base on my heart, it ended in negativity. Oh well, I'm almost 26 now. Just imagine all the negativity that occurred. It piles up and becomes quite a traumatic experience. 

Though, tonight, I just finished watching the movie "Me, before you". So I'm feeling a bit expressive. Gosh, I just hope it doesnt get awkward after writing this haha! 

As of today, I am single. Havent had a GF for almost 4 years! (FOUR F**KING YEARS!) lol.  But as I said before, I tried and I failed. Many many many times. My heart has many stories to tell, screaming to let it all out. Lets just write one at a time (or a very long time).

Once upon of time, I was a student. I have huge crushes on smart women. Yes, I like smart women alot. There was one girl in particular, who studies down the highway from my university. I really like the way she represent herself. She's a very charming character. One day, I decided to ask her out.

So I picked her up at her university and we went dinner at a nearby shopping mall. I've been to the restaurant before and my favourite meal was the 4 cheese mac and cheese and I ordered that. That particular year, people were crazy about macarons. So we ordered that too. We didnt like it lol.

So from that night on, we became good friends in trying out various restaurants and watched movies together. So we went out many times afterwards. But over a while, I still didnt have any confidence in going further with her. I keep holding back and feel nervous talking to her, even though we went out multiple times. Honestly, I feel that I am not good enough for her, I really didnt want to disappoint her.

At the end of the particular year, I ended up in a relationship with someone else. Lets cut the relationship with someone else short, she married someone else by now lol.

So after I broke up with the someone else. I thought, I should try going out with her again. So I did. We went out, going here and there. However, she was shy of having a photo with me. She said, it would make people think that she's not single. ( I swear I wanted to let her know what my heart felt inside, but still did not had the courage to do so.) There was one occasion where she posted a picture of  her and me on instagram, but many moments later, she deleted the photo...

I graduated and moved back to my hometown, so we didnt see each other for quite a long while. During my graduation, she told me she wanted to come, but cancelled last minute because she thought it would be awkward for her to come alone. But later that night, she asked me out for dinner. and so I went. I still didnt had the courage to let my heart out. So it was just a friendly dinner. Though, she declared me friendzone. Uncertain whether she meant it or not lol.

 A few months later. I got my first job. So we still occasionally texted and hangout. There was one time she asked me out to take her to her friend's brother's wedding. (gosh, thats long to type haha lol). As we arrived at the table, her friend was like sayin', awww sweet couple (I hope so lol). 

After I got my 2nd job, we still hung out and watched movies together. But i stopped hanging out with her when my job involved me working outstation. I still remember the last time we went out for a movie. I remember that I treated her for some gourmet waffles for her pre-birthday (it was almost her birthday). We watched a movie and I sent her back to her hostel. At the hostel, as i dropped her, she waited for me until my car was away. As I almost got away, I lowered the windows and asked her, what are you waiting for? She told me she was waiting for me. I was like, oh. Then I drove away. As I drove back home, I just kept wondering, she never waited for me to drive away. Not even once. And that was the last time I went out with her to our favourite hangout. Why did she waited for me? did she wanted me to stop the car, get out, get on my knees and let my heart out? it just remains as an unanswered question.....

It was quite a long while till I got to see her again. She then graduated and had a graduation ceremony. I really wanted to impress her mother with a large bunch if flowers (the really effing expensive type with teddies and other stuffs lol). But, I couldnt. Not because I dont want to, it was because.... I was outstation, in the middle of the sea..... Yes, i missed the big moment to impress her and most importantly, her parents (lol semangat).

I did got to see her again at the end of the year. She was around, we hangout with a bunch of friends, but I was still in that awkward position.

From the first time up until today, it just feels awkward texting her , I just couldnt be myself. I think I know why or so I think. There's always a reminder in my head that keeps saying, your not good enough for her. And there's also my overthinking habit....

I only saw her twice last year. Both occurrences were with our mutual friends. There never was just me and her moments....

and i still feel awkward....

I guess that is all.....

Gosh, it has been a long time I wrote straight to the point expressive blog post lol

feels good. To clear things up, if u r confused reading this, I never had a gf-bf relationship with her.

we are still friends but I am still that awkward man in an awkward position...

Cheers! 

One week planned picnic @ The Nahara Kalumpang, KKB/Tg Malim

About a week and a half ago, the usual Singleton Yuppies of SAMURA (SYOS) had a casual hangout at Subang Jaya. The topics discussed at these regular hangouts starts from anything, such as politics, love, career and up to business deals (lol). So we had a discussion on where to hangout next. so we proposed somewhere outdoorsy, a PICNIC.

Then the weekend came, Datin Syaima proposed that we go for a picnic at a place called The Nahara Kalumpang. The place wasnt so far from where most of the SYOS members lived, it was nearby Tanjung Malim, though it is in KKB, but you have to go through Tg Malim toll to get there... (inception lol)

As a normal ritual for yuppies, if you are organizing an event, you create a whatsapp group for it, and so we did. More and more joined the group and we distributed the tasks. Tasks consists of whoever was in charge of the drinks, mash potatoes, pasta, LAMB! (HELL YEAH), CHICKENNN, Ice cream and many more.... And the usual lot who is not in charge of anything, shall do the cooking during the picnic.

A week later, D-Day came. I was in charge of pasta. As for how yuppies learn to cook, I saw an interesting recipe, Shrimp Fajita Fettuccine on Tasty. So I decided to cook that, but i modified it and used Linguine instead, since it was much more easier to manage and used pre-mix fajita spices (lol pemalas!). The results..... drumroll please (you've prolly saw the picture on my FB or IG already lol) 

Honestly, it looks more red in real life. I forgot to buy chilly flakes and put chilly padi instead to give it a kick hehe

At the last minute Izyan couldnt make the mash potatoes, so I had to save the day to make the mash potato. I took a big shortcut and used a food processor instead lol. Here's the result (The recipe is secret hehe)

Tadaaa!

After cooking, I packed everything and dozed off for the big day tomorrow. So we started our journey by rendezvousing at Hisyam's house at 9, picked syaima at her house and arrived the place just before 11. The others arrived abit earlier to book the BBQ spot. The BBQ spot had a bloody power socket! so I brought my hotplate to heat up the pasta and mash potatoes. We also used the hot plate to cook the lambs since the BBQ pit was full :D After having our picnic, we went for a dip in the river. we ate all of the leftovers after the swim. hungry as hell! haha So here is the list of the food we brought, Pasta, Mash Potatoes, Lamb, Chicken, Salad, Coleslaw, Watermelon, oranges, soft drinks, and ICE CREAM!

BBQ Team

Heating up the pasta for the kids lol

Syaima cooking the lamb

Chicken!

That million dollar face, you know there's lamb when he does that haha

 




 

Youngest of the Yuppies

Caught in the act ( the same chopsticks was used for the cooking, YUM!)

90's Boy Band hair

I hope this will be the first of many hangouts to come, long live Singleton Yuppies of SAMURA!

Before going back

To top it all, lets have another look at the million dollar face (coz its definitely worth it!)

P/S: Please dont sue me hisyam hahaha Thank you everyone for making it happen

Thanks to Izyan for her amazing Samsung Galaxy S7 Edge Camera and her GoPro Hero 4

25th and Beyond!

Hooray! i'm 25 now lol

Anyway, it has been a week since my 25th birthday. Things didnt out so well in the first week. It didnt went well even on the birthday itself. I'm not sure it was quarter life crisis or what, i was broken as i have never been broken before. Probably because of the collective stress, anxiety and an uncertain future. I was so down, i was in not in the right mind to be at work the following day. So i took a day off. I watched a video on "the sanity of madness", seems that it is normal to have a mental breakdown and take a break in order to carry on. So that is what i did.

I continued working the next day, with high hopes on any good news, but, hmmmm, i was partially broken i guess, what i expected never came to be. But the bright side, i'm safe until december at this economic uncertainty. I just carried on for the week.

Then the weekend came, I was planning to go to Muar. So i decided to have a round of golf with one the teachers of my ex-school. Arrived at Tanjong Emas Golf Club around 745am. I tee'd off as soon as i got out of the car. Had really bad shots for the first few holes, probably because i decided to change my swing style the previous day. But it got really good for the last few holes, I stick back to my old style and manage to get 2 pars. After the first round, i got bored, coz my mates from KL havent arrived Muar yet, so I decided to play another round and it was way way way better than my previous round. 

Later on that day, I decided to hang out at the famous 434 coffee shop. At first, I wanted to try the famous "Kopi Luwak", but then I was unsure of the syariah compliant status of the coffee, so i decided to try "Blue Mountain Coffee" i had no idea what it was, but the price was the same as Kopi Luwak, so i expected that it is just as good. For a small shot tea cup, it was RM21.20, and it was good..... The taste is so thick and rich, it just sticks to the back of your throat. 

Later on, as my mates arrived, we really had an epic meal together. Two whole chicken and two large murtabak singapore for 4 persons. So at night, we carried out our program at our school, english improvement training for the Form 5 students. It is my 5th year doing this, since it started in 2012. The kids are very engaged in participating the activity that we had, they really had lifted my spirit to go on with whatever I am doing. Overnight at the dorm, it felt weird coz there were form 1 students haha. 

The following day, I had breakfast with my ex-class teacher, catching up with stories and life. Later on for lunch, my goal was to find one of the best asam pedas in the country, so we went to Parit Jawa Muar. Lunch was cheap, meal for 3 was only RM31! 

On the way back, we stopped by a durian stall to get a bite. Gosh good durians are expensive lol. After durian, we continued back with our journey. Sent my mates back to uniten where they parked their cars and I continued back home. It rained really heavily on the way back from uniten, i managed to get home safely.

First post of '16

Hmmmm, last post was way back in october 2015, gosh, i miss going out to cameron. so what have i done since then hmmmmm lets recall. I remembered before the cameron trip, I got an email from the office that told me that i have to go to Vietnam to spend 3-5 weeks offshore, for pipeline freespan correction (just ignore it if it doesnt make any sense for you) and after cameron, i got an email that sai i had to go to thailand instead for tie-in spool installation (ignore this one too). The day that i got the email, I really didnt felt so good since i woke up that day. It was not because i had to go offshore, something came up later on that day. So I got my coverall and boots and stuff to go to offshore, I also hung out with the senior engineers at the cafe near the office after work, they had really delicious goreng pisang.

But later on that day, during the night, i discovered i was hit with food poisoning. I puked and puked and puked, till i could go no further and my body was shivering. The house was a total mess (I need to improve on this) and do you ever get really weird dreams when you are sick? yes, i had that too. I woke up in the middle of the night, every hour or so until I was dry. I went to the office the next day and head to the clinic ( my office building is really awesome, besides the gym and the really good cafe, there was also a clinic). Since i was dry and dehydrated overnight, the doctor gave me some salt solution and I slept like a baby in the clinic.

I got my MC, took the rest of the day headed home and slept some more. Later on the evening, I had to go offshore shopping (I really should start writing down checklist!) So i just bought whatever i could remember (luckily everything was enough) and I also bought a set of outstation shirts! (it were those plain Uniqlo t-shirts, which were dead cheap and super comfortable).

Woke up early next morning, head to the airport and head to kelantan (it was my first time in kelantan). I was suppose to get my boat ride on the same day, but there were logistic issues, so I had a chance to stay in kelantan overnight and head to the town and tried the awesome food. Kelantan has a very nice morning peaceful feel to it (oh i stayed in Kota Bahru, next to the old Castle muzium thingy, the hotel was Royal Guest House if i'm not mistaken) . I shared a room with a native Kelantanese too,  ( we had close names, so we got the same room lol). He took me around, showed me the places in Kota Bahru, yeah, it was nice.

Later on the second day in kelantan, I rode a bus to Kuala Terengganu and took a 9-10 hour boat to the middle of the sea. And tada! i arrived my house for the next 28 days. It was fun! I'll probably write about that in a different post.

After 30 days not home, I took a week off and went back to my parent's place. After a week, returned to the office all refreshed, and back to work. As I reached december, I joined a new dept, few months has passed, a few site visits and a few nights on board a docked ship hmmm and now I am here.

And now, I totally forgot what I initially wanted to write hahaha But i do feel better. Anyway, I got a golf tournament in a week! super excited about that. I havet been in a golf tournament in 2008! i've been practicing alot, and planning to hit the range for the rest of the week every day. I hope i could make it at least top 10 (theres 12 joining)

Oh, besides that I going for the Port Dickson swimathon on the 20th Of March 2016! I have no idea why I chose the 5km instead of the 2.5km. Oh well, I just wanna finish. Swim training has been going on, though I dont have the energy to do 5kilos after work, Been doing roughly 2 kilos once or twice in a week, the rest just a little over a kilo.

Thats all for now i guess. Gosh i feel super relaxed after writing this post haha. Should write post more often in 2016 and beyond.....


*i have no mood for proof reading, please ignore whatever typos or mistakes and correct them ursleves with ur mind lol*

The 24 Hour Trip

Gosh, my last blog post was on the 10th of December 2014! Almost 10 months has passed! Well, I've been a bit busy with my career and stuff, I really didnt had much to write though.... except about work la (I wouldnt want people to get annoyed if I write about work all the time! haha lol)

Anyway, I just got back from a 24 hour trip, yes literally 24 hours! My old lifeguard gangs and me decided to have a short trip to Cameron Highlands. It has literally been quite of a bad few past weeks for the weather, the HAZE JUST NEVER STOPS COMING AND GO! A short trip away from the haze was definitely worth it.

So the planning of the trip has been going on for a week or two and it never got thoroughly planned haha We initially wanted to go there for a hike but we hmmm sort of hiked lol. The final decision to go or not to go was made around Friday afternoon. So the trip was by one car (my lucky myvi) and 5 dudes, Me, Rashidi, Muhaimin and Adila (Lifeguards) and Adila's friend Jie.

From Left: Me, Rashidi, Muhaimin, Adila and Jie.

The trip started off from Gombak around 0045hrs. We decided to go to an RnR in Tapah, Perak and rest there before we started our climb to Cameron Highlands. The RnR was under renovation and there werent many shops opened. We just hung out, ate some snacks and drank some coffee.

The trip started off from Gombak around 0045hrs. We decided to go to an RnR in Tapah, Perak and rest there before we started our climb to Cameron Highlands. The RnR was under renovation and there werent many shops opened. We just hung out, chat, ate some snacks and drank some coffee. After a while, no one slept, no one rested and we were like, screw it, lets go up Cameron Highlands now! haha

So we ascended the route around 0430hrs. We ascended up through the scary Tapah route (yes at 0430hrs!) and I was the driver. We chatted almost non stop through up the route so that the driver was awake (lol). Even though the Tapah route was short and I drove up through there before during the day, at night, things just get a heck lot scarier, It was definitely one of the scariest drive of my life. Luckily there were some cars going up too, so I just tagged along at back and they become my guide.

We reached the Bharat Tea Cafe around 0545hrs (it was closed of course). We decided to stopped there for a while so that we could get a shot that were already reached the top hehe MULUT KELUAR ASAP! JAKUN! it was around 17-18 Degrees C.

Lighting came from the car headlights

After the short stop at Bharat Tea, we headed to the Masjid Abu Bakar Mosque at Tanah Rata. Interestingly, the Masjid has no airconds or fans (lol jakun) and the water was really really cold! At the break of dawn, we decided to climb up Gunung Brinchang, but stopped on the way to have breakfast. The ascend towards Gunung Brinchang was challenging but the view on the way was worth it. We stopped by a halfway point to brush our teeth and digest the view. I got a few time lapse in the youtube link below, one is the ascend the other is the cloud time lapse. 

Gunung Brinchang Ascend

Cloud Time Lapse

How I wish everyday brushing the teeth was like this

After the shot stop, we continued our ascend up until the lookout point at the cell tower areas. It makes you wonder, how the hell did they got the structures up there in the first place?

Can you see my lil myvi on the right?

 

The gang from up top

Feeling the wind Rajanikanth style

We then went down abit to the parking lot where the hiking trail is for the Mossy Forest. I did mention that we planned to go for a hike, so we did (sort of) haha. 

It was also Muhaimin's almost birthday! So we had a small celebration for him haha

Rocking out in batik (literally) 

It was slightly hazy at Cameron too

Brinchang Time lapse descend

After the 'sort of'' hike we head down to a cafe which sold everything that is related to strawberries. I had the waffle and strawberry juice.

This kid had a unique way of keeping warm

After having waffles, we had to our earlier checkpoint, the Bharat Tea Cafe to get some shots in the tea field.

Remember when we stopped by the Masjid earlier? Rashidi bumped into his friend, and it turns out his friend was getting married that day and invited us to come and have lunch at his wedding. 

After our lunch at the wedding, we headed to the market to go window shopping and to buy veggies and strawberries. We didnt took any photos coz we were too busy shopping! the traffic was crazy though, it took us almost an hour to reach the market. I bumped into Ghost Peppers, turns out the worlds most spicy pepper was grown at Cameron Highlands too. I really regret not buying them, coz they were only RM 4 a packet. But I still wonder what am I going to cook with them... haha After the market we headed back to KL. But we stopped by this lavender garden place, it was really nice place, with a cafe, retail store, flower garden, rabbits and a farm where they grow the veggies, strawberries and passion fruit.

Our Last Shot

We arrived KL around 11 oclock at night and arrived Shah alam around 12. It was truly a 24 hour trip. I got into bed as soon as I reached home. Above all, it was cheap, only around RM30 per person for fuel and toll. Really hope for more cheap short trips in the future.

p/s: the air pollution index is currently at 200