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Previous Blog Post Part 2

By  Dominic Blaaque     14.37     
So this post is a continuation of the previous post. I continued keeping my options clear. This morning during breakfast there was an interesting video posted on facebook. It was called 2 minute meditation for bitches who dont know how to meditate (yes, that is what exactly the video is about) After watching the video, I totally fell in love with the presenter. It is sad that the video aint on youtube otherwise, I would have posted it here.

There was another video I listened to during the drive on the way to JB. It was What I learned from 100 days of rejection by Jia Jiang. It was a ted talk, a very interesting one. After listening to the fruitful video, I realized my biggest fear. Rejection. This doesnt just affect my love life, it applies to almost everything. Among my greatest fear, is rejection from secretaries of whatever paperwork regardless of work or govt offices.

After watching the meditation video, I realized something. I realized what I am attracting to this one woman I've been dying to date with. She wasnt your typical girl, she was a bad ass girl who isnt afraid to voice out her opinions and take charge when she wants. The sort of really smart bad ass girl. That was why I could relate to the first video so much.

Lets get back to the second video. So it was about the guy's experience in facing rejection. I realize I may have just quit too soon. (quit what you may ask?) okay, lets talk about the girl first. I never have actually went out with her. She's a girl who is very dedicated to her job and her family. I really adore that about her. I like bad ass dedicated girls lol. Okay, well another thing that I like about her, is her love of cars. Which I give a hundred points for that trait.

We contact each other through social networks. Among the main events of my chronology with her, she posted something interesting from a market in her IG. I liked that interesting thing, so I text her and said can she buy that for me and so she did.

Many many many months later, I had received an interesting package at my office. I received the stuff from the market, she gave it to me as a gift. It also had a written post card with it and with the official stamp of her first job. (You see how passionate she is?! +++)

I texted her that I received the stuff and I really wanted to treat her for lunch. So, we continued texting each other once a while. My attraction towards her grew stronger and stronger over time. A few months later, I had a day off, she also had the day off, so I asked her out, she said YES!

I drove to her place which was an hour away and picked her up. She took me to a famous local beriyani shop nearby. She was so into her job, I remembered she was talking on the phone with her colleague during lunch for about 10 minutes, while I slowly ate my lunch. Was slightly annoyed initially because I really wanted to talk to her, but after a while, I understand she is bad ass at her job and that is really sexy, so I grew fonder towards her. (bad ass means good here, not bad lol)

After lunch, we went to the nearest city an hour away. Had a good walk and talk with each other, and multiple selfies.  It was interesting to know her more. Among the things that got me hooked, she likes having alone time , what I understand was, she hates people as much as I do and hates crowded places. Which was a trait that I live by. I was already imagining the quiet places we could go together in the future and enjoy each others company.

We also shared our family's traits and interests. I truly believe I could get along with her quite well. There were many points where the puzzle pieces falls perfectly into place.

After sending her back, we regularly text each other for the remaining weeks. I was planning to speak my heart out, I didnt want to rush, but the solid plan was there. It was just a matter of time. I had to go overseas for two months, before I flew, she gave me a call. We had a good talk, she had a hectic day but her voice was calm as she was heading to sleep.

As I was overseas, we texted regularly, Though towards the end of two months, her text response were slow and sometimes not at all. As I got back, I was on leave for two weeks. I texted her that I really wanted to meet her as I was nearby, but her response was she was too busy to even go out for a short dinner and she felt it was unfair to me to drive an hour away just to meet her for a short meet up.

My heart was crushed. I was actually planning to clear things out to her, to let her know what I feel about her and hopefully if everything works out, we could plan out the next step. But I guess that was just it. I couldnt bear to take any further steps.

Referring to the previous post regarding on my overthinking, I still couldnt stop thinking about her. Thinking on, what did I have done wrong, what was the wrong step, where did I messed up, I still couldnt figure it out and it gave me a bad headache.

Now back to the earlier paragraphs. Rejection. and so i thought, maybe I quit a bit too soon. Since I am going to pass by her place later today, I decided to text her and asked her out. She was on her off day, though she had to turn me down, she had plans already for the day. I really dont know what sign is this, should I call it quits?

About Dominic Blaaque

Idzham Ibrahim, your friendly neighbourhood unemployed mech eng graduate

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